Listening-the missing skill

-                          Everyone admits that one of keys to keeping your kids out of trouble is listening to them. When your kids are talking to you, how do you listen? Is just "uh huh" or do you look at them and listen to what they are saying? Do you stop mixing your pot/washing the dishes/watching your favorite TV program, turn towards them and listen? It makes a difference. It makes a difference since your body language and facial expressions tell your child that what they are saying is important to you.

Some of the ways that you show you are not really listening – interrupting, fidgeting, shifting your eyes/no eye contact, yawning, writing everything down, finishing sentences, giving advice( which is really criticism) when it is not requested.

Are you listening in a judgmental way or are you listening with an open heart? Are you thinking about what you are trying to respond or are you listening with your heart and then getting inspired to respond to your child with what is right and not what you want to hear? Acknowledge their feelings, review some of the main points they mentioned. Do not respond in  an accusatory tone.

Everyone listens faster than they can talk. People unfortunately, also have selective hearing; they hear what they want to hear and not what they heard. I have numerous times scheduled appointment with my children only to hear them say "but we didn't schedule it or I forgot/I am not around/ I have something else important to do". I have learned from that experience and always finalize the appointment by saying "OK , Julie, can you please repeat to me, "my appointment with the dentist is Tuesday, July 22 at 2:00 in the afternoon."

If you "practice" listening to your kids properly, it is only a small step to listening to your business partners in a professional manner that will be beneficial to all.

Print Handwriting or Cursive Handwriting It doesn't make a difference-just write it down!

Print Handwriting or Cursive Handwriting

It doesn't make a difference-just write it down!

The state of Indiana has removed cursive writing from their curriculum. In my daughters school all classes are equipment with computers and barcode screen, as well as internet connection. I grew up not only learning cursive writing but also typing. I always enjoyed the girls in my class who had the cute curly, swirly handwriting, but the typing classes have helped me more in life. (Thank you, Ms. Kahn- wherever you may be)

As I grew older, I came to prefer print to cursive handwriting. I worked for many years in dental offices, where the charts were filled out by hand. It can be very challenging to understand what the dentist is trying to say when I am reading chicken scratches. Today most medical and dental offices are going paperless to avoid confusions and misunderstanding due to spelling or handwriting issues.

Today, I seldom use a paper and pencil for composing letters. I mostly type everything -blog posts, letters, etc. It is so much easier to change your mind, add a line, copy/paste than using a pen and paper. But I find that I have a special connection when something is written down with a pen a paper. Prayers or for that matter, any request, are so much more effective when written and not typed.  

The art of "thank you" notes is so much more personal when it is handwritten than typed. Even if I use a standard card but add a few words and sign my name, I feel a bigger connection than if I would just have some "with compliments" stationary printed up with my name. A diary, even if it is a simple notebook has more emotions than the most expressive blog.

I hope the art of writing does not get removed from the school curriculum; there is nothing simpler than a piece of paper and a pencil to get your point across.

Lots of love-

Judy 

Network Marketing Oyster Warmers

Everyone knows that inside an oyster can be hidden a beautiful pearl. It can take opening hundreds  of oysters to find the concealed gem. Would an oyster fisherman, after opening an oyster and not finding a pearl, close it up and nurture it in the hope of finding one day a pearl? I doubt it.

Network marketers need to learn from the oyster fisherman how to treat prospects. They invite a prospect who agrees to come to the opportunity meeting…but doesn't show up. Once, twice, each time you are standing at the entrance waiting for them and they don't show up. Each time they find a legitimate excuse why not to show up.

Maybe it's time to part ways with the person? They know you have an opportunity. They know where to find you when the timing is right. Now the timing is not right for them. Don't lose sleep. Take only the volunteers. There are so many people out there for whom the timing IS right; those are the prospects you want to approach. Those are the prospects that are looking for a change in their life and you are the one to provide it.

Keep fishing……

Lots of love,  Judy

Network marketing- just like being a mother, Simple, but easy?

There is nothing simpler than being a mother, all a woman has to do is get pregnant and have a baby- presto, you are a mother!.

But easy to be a mother? Having raised 5 kids, I would be lying if I said yes. Middle of the night feeding, sick children, homework, fighting among sibling, there are lots of challenges to be a mother.

It's similar with network marketing. Network marketing is simple- Use product, recommend products to people, and sponsor people. But is it really that easy?

Use the product – that's easy. All I have to do is buy the product and use it. But did I remember to buy the product, or (oops) did I finish my stock and not order some in my next home delivery?

Use it- Do I remember to take my vitamins, or am I in a rush and forget to take my vitamins? Do I remember to use my skin care system, or am I too tired to use them? Do I know the proper proportions to dilute the energy concentrate for best results?

Recommend products- are you embarrassed to recommend products to friends? You have received benefit from the product, why aren't you sharing the benefits with them. They have two choices, buy product from you or not. Don't get caught up in the outcome. When they see you healthier, with more energy, they will want some too.

You would recommend a good dentist to your friends? If you would own a shoe store wouldn't you tell your friends about the great new shoes that you have in stock and encourage them to buy from you? Would you get offended if they prefer to go to Wal-Mart and spend  $1.99 on a pair of flip flops? Don't get caught up in the outcome.

Sponsor people- only take the volunteers. Don’t run after people who aren’t interested in what you have to offer. If they are a friend/relative that sees you often, they will notice the positive change in you, they will notice that you are happier, are looking different, or maybe even buying fancy things. They will either be envious and jealous of your success or they will want to join up and do what you are doing to get the same results.

Sorry to say, but there are some people who enjoy being miserable, it makes them get noticed, it gets them attention. These are the types of people who aren't interested in improving their lives or themselves and will discourage you from anything that will help you grow (and get away from them).

Inform, don't convince- when you are telling family and friends about your business opportunity/products, you are informing them about its availability. If you have to convince them to join, you will also have to convince them to work. If they see other people using your company's product they will remember that you also talked to them about the products/company and will come to YOU for more information because they are comfortable with you.

So what's going to be easier, taking the volunteers or forcing people kicking and screaming? The secret is have fun in the process. The choice is yours.

Lots of love- Judy

WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get)

There is a misconception in society that what you see is what you get- I think that is mistaken concept, Nothing happens in a vacuum. If "Michael" gets thrown out of a dinner party by his arch-enemy , "Mike",  due to a misunderstanding  in invitations, it's not an isolated incident.  Micheal's reaction to this insult-he complains to the Chief of Police, this then becomes the catalyst for the entire downfall of a family.   In the bible if Joseph's brothers sell him to slavery , it's because 20 years down the line he will be the prime minister of Egypt and have the political power to take care of his family during a famine. There are many incidents in history and in our own personally lives that we don’t give someone the benefit of the doubt , but when we find out the truth, we are embarrassed.

How many stories have you read of people who missed being killed in the World Trade Center disaster because of some strange argument with their spouse/child or strange delay that morning? I personally know of a young man who was working in the WTC as an accountant and decided September 1^st to quit his job and become a teacher, his parents thought he was crazy but when September 11^th rolled around they realized that his decision caused him to saved.

As parents and mentors it is our responsibility not to judge at first view but use our god given gifts of analysis until we discover the reason.  Maybe your child is hungry so he is misbehaving; maybe the lady talking to you with slurred language isn't drunk but is going into diabetic shock, or has cerebral palsy. 

The note-

Have you ever needed to send a note to your child's teacher excusing a lateness or absence? If you have no children, have you ever needed to send a "real" note to a co-worker requesting something?

What did the note look like? Was it a piece of paper torn off the weekly shopping list, a sticky note or maybe even a piece of scrap paper and jotted down haphazardly?

Any note you send to someone not only contains the specific message but  is also a reflection what you think of them.

If your child requests a note for the teacher and you take the effort to write a note on a proper piece of paper with the teacher's name "Mr. Jones" and not "to the math teacher", then you put it in an envelope and address it to the teacher it becomes an unwritten message to the teacher that you value his effort and it shows the child that you value the teacher to send a proper letter.

Personally, when I have to sign a permission slip for a class trip, almost always add a note to the bottom of the page "have a nice time", "watch out for wandering monkeys" (for the zoo), or something else that shows I value the trip and the efforts of  the school to arrange the class trip.

If you need to send a note to a co-worker or client, a handwritten note on a nice piece of paper is a reflection of what you want your relationship to be with them. Even if it just says "With Compliments from Judy"  a note like this means a lot to them and it will give them a good impression of you.